beginning of the end.

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It has been a little over four months since I first step foot in Vietnam.  July 16th, 2006 felt like yesterday.  I still remember meeting my mother’s distant relatives for the first time, eating extra amounts of food with them, and sipping on cafe den with Ong Loi.  I still remember the bustling city of Bangkok, where Hao, Matt, and I went to get bootleg DVDs and games.  I still remember the high-tech, environment friendly city of Singapore, and Jahore Bahru’s cheap malls with nice clothes stores.  As many people say, time really does fly by when one is enjoying life.  It is quite unbelievable that it has been over four months already, with only one month to go before I head home to my monotonous life.  In this early reflection of my journey here in Southeast Asia, there are many memorable moments that are filling up my thoughts.  Too many to have a clear thinking process, too many to list.  But I will list a few.

Family
meeting extended family for the first time was a nerve wrecking, yet highly anticipated event.  I remember when Hao and I landed to Than San Nhat Airport in Saigon/TPHCM, there were thousands of eyes looking at us as we were heading towards the doors.  Right before I walked through the door, there was a feeling of shock that overcame me.  What to expect?  These pathetic worries were short-lived.  Ong Loi’s family was warm welcoming towards the both of us and treated us like family, that’s because we are.  The transition to Vietnam was a breeze thanks to the guidance of them.  The relationships I’ve made with my family in the south will always be remembered and long-lasting as I do plan on returning to Vietnam in the near future.  Although we live thousands of miles away, there will always be a connection.

As for family here in Hanoi, my father’s brother, or my uncle, whichever is easier to comprehend, has always been quite receptive and open in the process of getting to know me.  His entire family has been warm towards me and treating me as if we have known each other forever.  This meeting with my uncle compared to my mother’s extended family was at a higher level of nervousness since he is my father’s direct brother, a much different kinship than that of distant relatives.  The last time my father has seen him was well over fifty years and I would be seeing him before my father would see him again.  Like my family in the South, my family here in the north is extremely kind to me and makes a grand effort for both of us to get to know each other.

Vietnam, its culture, and its people
One of my main aspirations for coming to study here was to discover my roots.  Vietnam for twenty years of my life existed in my mind as a distant far away land where my family fled due to political reasons.  With many Vietnamese Americans, the older generation that is, having been part of my life growing up, the notion of Vietnam overall was not a good one.  Many of the refugees of the 70’s left Vietnam because of Communism, causing them to view Vietnam in a negative way; as a chaotic jungle with a small group of people exploiting an entire country.   Vietnam was primitive.   I began to stray away from this image of Vietnam painted by others.  Many of who view the country as such has yet to even return.  What do they know of Vietnam today?  Nothing but speculation and assumptions.  I came here to find out what Vietnam is, what its culture is like, and to befriend the citizens.  Four months have passed and I have learned so many things about this country that I ever learned about in my entire life in the U.S.  I now am able to view the beauties of the country from which my ancestors derived, to truly understand what Vietnamese culture is, and perhaps have met some of the most spectacular individuals of my life here.  Vietnam is no longer a war-torn country.  It has moved on from the war and look towards the future.  The concepts and traditions of the country are now better understood, even though some I do have to say I disagree with.  And of course, the people.  They are extremely friendly.  Being a Vietnamese-American, I initially worried about the reactions or types of discriminations towards me for being a Viet Kieu coming to live in Vietnam for half a year.  These worries subsided quite quickly as I learned that Vietnamese people as a whole are extremely receptive and intrigued by Vietnamese Americans.  Of course, with positive, there are negative issues of these three I have been able to grasp likewise.  Vietnam is a communist country and some of the actions and consequences of course do not run parallel with my views and beliefs.  Service is often times terrible, people do not understand the concept of a line, and a few, but not all take advantage of Vietnamese Americans because they have money.  Despite these minute irrationalities, what I have so far learned from my time here about the country itself, its culture, and the people has been a beneficial one.

A less fast paced life
In the States, the fast paced life structures my routine.  I feel rushed, a need to get to places quickly, and finish things both efficiently and at a timely matter.  Of course, there are positive remarks to these points, but slowing down can be quite enjoyable.  The life in Vietnam is very less stressful I feel than it is in the States, where there is no time to relax, no time to enjoy life, but rather suffer for money.  Work dominates our lives in the States.  Often times, individuals have no time for their own family, which can be quite horrific.  My first week here in Vietnam it was quite visible that the people of Vietnam, although not possessing the same means and assets as those in the States, they may enjoy life more.  A vague claim indeed, but a strong opinion nonetheless.  But if one were to view this through the lens of traffic, my opinion may be challenged.  There just seems to be more individuals who take time to enjoy personal relationships with others than with their job.  It might just be that there is a higher level of unemployment here in Vietnam causing me to see so many people out on the streets enjoying themselves, but this assumption cannot be proven unless I ask, and I wish not to ask, thus my views of Vietnam being slower paced stands still. 

Friendships
Where to begin?  It is not always where one is that is important, but rather who one’s with.  But luckily for me, it is a coupling of both.  Being in Hanoi itself is a pleasure, but being in Hanoi with spectacular people is such beyond explanation.  The friendships forged here may remain here and end with the conclusion of the study abroad program.  When I think about it, it is quite sad that this may just occur.  But viewing the situation with the glass half full, what I’ve shared with these people here will always be a great memory for the both of us.  Even though we may be at different points in our lives, different locations, we can always look back on the five months we’ve spent together and a smile will come to our faces.  Contact may not be necessary but we share a connection that will last forever.  Corny it may sound, but it’s the wonders of such events.  I had a conversation with one of my friends from the UC program about a similar topic.  
The concept of creating miraculous memories from the fruitful interactions with one another, may it be one day or ten, such a situation can be reflected upon in the future as a beautiful one.   We can look back on the event and see how beautiful things really were.  Prolonging it may corrupt the image and the beauties blossomed.  She ascribed this philosophy to relationships with the other sex, whereas I apply it to friendships.  Repetitive as I may be, the wonders erected between those befriended and I will always be remembered. 

Until next time,

Tran Quy Hac.

 

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